Fucking A. You'd think with a fivehead like that, some creativity could be found within. I'm afraid that isn't the case. This man goes by the name of David Tanny, you may have heard of him if you ever Googled "most purely unfunny person on the face of the fucking planet".

You really can't appreciate how bad this is until you hear it. So, lets pause for a minute so you have a chance to give your ears herpes.

I'd imagine I've established my point, and if you haven't killed yourself by now there isn't much point in me continuing anyway because that "video" really speaks for itself. But, think about this a little.

Not only was that supposed to be a good song, it was supposed to be funny. This man calls himself a comedian. Can you with the laser pointer indicate where in this video a joke is? Fuck analyzing if they're funny or not, WHERE ARE THEY. 

I assure you, the more you look, the worse it gets. When I first found this and saw a CD consisting of "parodies" of TV commercials, I should have known to run. Hell, I did know to run, I just didn't because frankly I don't really like myself. 

This is the backlash of Weird Al ever getting any praise. Now, Weird Al wasn't my cup of tea, but you had to at least acknowledge he had some level of talent. Unfortunately, his admirers come up with the bright idea that they're going to be the next big thing writing "parody songs", which falls flat for a lot of reasons. First of all, HEY, HAVE YOU NOTICED HOW WEIRD AL IS THE ONLY ONE THAT EVER GOT ANYWHERE DOING THIS, HINT HINT. Secondly, if you're going to carry out this idea, at least know what it fucking means. Saying "boobs" a lot and adding a laugh track isn't a parody, it's a sad and immature cry for help from somebody that should not be attempting to do what they are doing.

Also, that Metalocalypse comedy episode, where they see the stand up comedian at the club and his entire set is "(old reference) REMEMBER THOSE? REMEMBER THOSE?"...... yeah, that was not meant to be taken seriously. Endlessly rattling off the titles of things from the 80's is not comedy. Saying "we were watching Cheers" is not comedy. You are not comedy.

Look. David Tanny may be a nice guy. Maybe he's great with kids, maybe he's the friendly neighbor you can always count on to grab your paper off the lawn when you go on vacation. That isn't the point. He is listing himself as a comedian, and he simply isn't one. Not like Dane Cook "I don't like him but I can at least locate where he is attempting to be funny", as in I literally cannot determine what I am supposed to be amused by.

When I go to a restaurant, I don't expect to walk into a building that some guy is in the corner watching TV, he says "hi", and that's it. It might not be good food, but at one point or another, I expect to get a fucking plate of something. I'm currently at the David Tanny Comedy Buffet, and I am starving to death.

Labels: david tanny homosex